Tag: asexuality

predatoryopportunist:

okay folks, PSA:

PLEASE for the love of Jebus do NOT (do not not not not not) under any circumstances defend ace/aro folks by saying “we’re/they’re not sociopaths!!”

unfortunately i see this fairly frequently and it is incredibly ableist:

a) sociopath is not an actual diagnostic term, it’s just a nasty catch-all fearmongering word meaning “scary evil crazy person” that further stigmatizes people with mental illness

b) when you protest discrimination and prejudice by saying “but we’re not crazy!!!” what you’re inadvertently implying is that people who are “””crazy””” deserve to be oppressed 

c) i am quite confident that there ace/aro spec people who experience mental illness characterized by low empathy (you know, those “””scary””” mentally ill people) and idk why you’d want to throw them under the bus like that.

Please pass it on.

fawnwitch:

intj-confessions:

auditorycheesecakes:

onyxjuniper:

frecklesandsky:

I just read this super sad post about this girl who’s asexual and married and everyone is basically telling her that she doesn’t deserve her husband/she’s just a prude/she should just do it anyway.
So I want to tell you all right now that if people tell you this, or if they tell you you’ll never have a relationship, it is BULLSHIT.
My husband is asexual and I’m not. He’s sex repulsed, we don’t have sex, we never have.
And it doesn’t matter to me. You know what does? He does. His mental health and wellbeing matter to me. Because he is my best friend and he’s one of the smartest, kindest, funniest people I’ve ever met. And he’s had people tel him that he’s broken and it makes me SO ANGRY because they are WRONG.
Being different doesnt mean you’re broken.
If you don’t like sex/don’t want it/etc. Do not let anyone tell you that you’re inferior because you’re not.
Do not let anyone convice you that you’ll never have a relationship because they’re wrong(if you want one).
You are not broken, and it will be okay.

This made me feel really good. Remember this, for all my ace spectrum friends out there

#it’s really reassuring to hear from the partner #the one who’s not ace #but is totally cool with having no sex #loves her husband anyway #is in a stable and happy relationship #it’s such a relief when you discover that asexuality is a thing #that you’re okay #but then you start to wonder if it means your only chance at not ending up alone is finding someone else who’s also ace #but no #turns out it’s not #that’s really good to hear #so #thanks #so ace #so space

I hope you don’t mind me reblogging your tags but these are my feelings EXACTLY

I’m always a little nervous that I’m not “good enough” for a “real relationship” because sex isn’t on the table. So yeah, these stories are reassuring

The amount of pressure from society to have sex is incredible. We’re told it’s linked to relationship health and if you’re not willing to do every damn thing you’re labeled a prude. It’s incredibly disheartening, especially considering how one’s libido can change over the years even if you’re not ace. Nice to see a supportive piece from a partner.

I legit cried.

maljoylove13:

scribeling:

Do you ever go to your fridge because you’re hungry, but once you open it you just stare inside and want none of it? You open your pantry but still nothing appeals to you. Maybe someone even comes and suggests something, and even though you don’t know what you want, you still know that everything they said isn’t right. So you just stand around confused and hungry for no reason.

That’s what it’s like to be an asexual with a sex drive.

Thank you this was helpful